I know, I know, but…

I surfed the internet and I noticed that some sites excited me, and some sites made parts of my body hurt. Scientific sites punished me, while sites like “Girls Gone Wild” would raise my heartbeat and make my nipples harden.

I started keeping track of those sites that excited and those that punished, and the more intelligent they seemed to be, the more I was punished. I picked the Journal of the American Medical Association and started clicking randomly through the online articles, and I hurt, all over my back, buttocks and thighs, as though I was being spanked for being there. I stayed there, and I could feel the blows landing on my flesh, even though there was no way I could be spanked.

Finally I could take it no longer, I left that site for my email and the beating stopped. So given that, my Internet traffic was being monitored and I was going to be de-educated.

It didn’t matter, I still had the TV.

But when I turned it on, the same thing happened. I could be on things that are stupid all I wanted, Playboy Channel, E! and other channels that didn’t teach much were acceptable, but any news program, Discovery, History and PBS were all punishing me. Apparently it was desirable to have my brain turn to mush.

I went to LiveJournal and updated the things that had happened to me and started a blog site about living with my restraints. I put up my first post, detailing all that had happened to me and then shut my computer down.

I didn’t know what to do now, so I turned off all the electronic stuff and got ready for bed.

I got undressed and put the clothes in the hamper. I then got out a satin nightgown and slid it on over my body, reveling in the feeling. I pulled out the restraints I would have to have on that night, and I locked the cuffs on my ankles and wrists. I attached the straps to each and held them so I could insert the strips into the slot in the bedposts.

I secured my feet first and then turned off the light switch near the bed. I laid back and attached my collar to the bed, then the wrist restraints. I was now securely spread-eagled on my new bed and helpless.

It took me a long time to fall asleep with the nagging pulses between my legs, and just the excitement of being restrained.

I somehow managed to sleep however, and sure enough, I woke at 4 AM with a pulse of pain in my neck. Apparently that was to be my alarm every morning. The cards and attached tethers popped out of the slots in the bedposts and I was free to pull my hands down and pull my feet up. I stepped over to the wardrobe and the cuffs came undone. I stripped my nightgown and tossed it on my bed and looked at the pony rig out.

It was fairly standard, I guess, for pony rigs. The harness would attach to my crotch chastity and my anal chastity plugs. The leather spread up my body, cupping and emphasizing my breasts while it also attached to itself under my arms and down my sides. There was a pair of straps going over my shoulders and attaching to the back of the harness, completing the exercise outfit.

I picked up the tail and pushed it somewhere near my anal plug, and it seemed to grab it and hang on to that tail. I slipped my feet into the pony boots, complete with iron horse shoes, and I felt them locking on my feet and up my ankles. I was a bit relieved at that because I was worried about twisting my ankle.

I was standing much taller. The pony boots were an 8” heel at least. I was literally standing on the tips of my toes, with a whole bunch of wood and steel touching the ground.

I got down the U-Glove and put it where I could get a hold of it rather rapidly. I reached up to the bit and bridle and pulled it down. It took me a few moments to sort out the straps and to start putting it on.

The bit came near the oral chastity and the metal merged with the oral chastity to become one thing. It was plain that my mouth was going to be in the control of this mass of leather and steel, and all I could do was move along with it. I slipped the straps over my head and around my neck in the proper places, and they all grabbed each other and latched, and then attached itself to the harness I was already wearing.

I picked up the reins and hooked the ends on the large rings that my bit was equipped with. I then tied the reins up to the T shaped bar which descended from the ceiling in the track system. I made sure to tie them tightly and I pulled against it with my bit to make sure it wouldn’t come undone.

Next came my mane. I grabbed the hair comb that was designed for this and pulled my hair back into a standard pony tail. But something interesting happened, the hair adhered to my back, right at my spine. It hung down and apparently I was going to have a real mane from my own head. My bangs also got somewhat longer and flopped down over my eyes.

I sighed and I realized I sounded just like a horse.

I started getting warning tingles from my chastity devices so I picked up the U-Glove and slipped my left arm into it as far as it would go. I felt the top of the glove lock around the top of my bicep. It was a long sleeve that hung down far past my fingers, and I needed to put my other arm in the other end. I put my arms behind me and fumbled for a bit to slide my hand into the opening.

It was easy once I got my hand in, the glove itself helped me out by sucking my entire arm into it, forcing my forearms to touch each other with my hands cupping the opposite elbow. Then came the expected tightening around my upper bicep on my right arm, then the entire glove tightened to immobilize my arms. I was truthfully helpless. Now I was also very very horny.

Once that was done the T bar on the track came to life. It started moving out around the room, and since my reins were tied to it, I had no choice but to follow. I was wet as hell and needed to cum badly, but I was helpless to do anything. I knew my nanobots were helping make me horny, and I didn’t care, this was heaven.

The T bar lead me into the living room, then walked me around it for about five or six passes, warming my muscles up. I knew what was to happen; I had watched it enough times.

Once I had my muscles warmed up, and I was somewhat used to the pony boots, it took me to the kitchen where it pulled me up to the treadmill. I stepped gingerly up on it, mainly because I wasn’t allowed to look down. The pressure on my reins kept my head erect and all I could do was roll my eyes.

Once on the treadmill, I walked all the way to the end, where the wires were sticking out. I was pulled until my crotch bumped into that area, and I felt my plug come to life. I thought this might be the time when it recharged, but I was in for a surprise.

The treadmill started moving. I started walking, pulling against the reins occasionally. I wasn’t going very fast, just a slow amble, but the plug inside me was being vibrated and it was pleasuring me as I walked. As I was able to look downward, I saw that the wires were attached to the plug, and that was the source of the stimulation.

I kept walking. Some times the walking was hard to do as the treadmill slowed down, and I thought that meant I was going uphill. The TV was on, showing me a film of terrain I was walking on, with another pony in front of me. There would be tugs against my reins, I would feel pops against the backs of my legs occasionally, which I took to be a carriage whip, and I kept walking.

As I said we weren’t going very fast, but my heart did beat quickly, I was being rewarded in my sensitive areas, and I was being encouraged by the reins and the whip.

I wasn’t sweating much, probably because we were going slowly. I figured that the next few days would be slow and steady to build up my endurance; I would be well and truly soaked in sweat later.

My feet ached. My jaw ached. I felt as though I had walked twenty five miles, and this was just my first day. I didn’t know how those people who did this exercise every day did it.

My T-bar led me back through the living room again, and walked me around to cool me down. Ten circuits was enough since I wasn’t really winded, and then it led me back into the bedroom.

Once I got in front of the wardrobe again, the U-Glove unlocked from my arms, and it was just a matter of pulling my arms apart to get it off. I started unstrapping the harness from me, and it cooperated by coming off completely. I got to the gag and bit, it came undone as well, taking the whole gag with it. I undid my hair and it swirled around me again.

I won’t lie, I was really bushed. An hour of exercise would tire anyone out, especially with it simulated through various means that I was pulling a cart. I wondered what it would be like to actually pull a cart.

I stripped. I pulled everything off that I could take off and headed for the shower. At 5:45 AM, I turned on the water and stepped in. The water was hot and it eased my sore muscles very well. I scrubbed to get the sweat off my body and out of my hair.

You know, a shower where you can’t feel your own nipples is really odd. I felt the water hitting me right up to the area that was desensitized by the Bodyform, and then I didn’t feel anything. I knew the water was there, I could see the rag washing myself, but I couldn’t feel a thing.

Believe it or not, even THAT got me horny.

I dried myself and made sure my hair was dry. I then picked out the clothes I would wear to work.

While Chasti-Permalock was informing my associates, friends and acquaintances, I didn’t know if that extended to informing my employer of what happened to me. I decided to forego any of the restraints that I wanted to have on just in case my manager hadn’t been informed. I put my oral chastity in my purse to take with me however. I picked a conservative business suit with skirt, cut very tight on my body. I pulled the stockings up and attached them to the garters from my corset.

Sapphire blue skirt, sky blue silk blouse, sapphire blue jacket to match; the same sapphire blue on my shoes to go with the ensemble, were all quickly put on. I stepped into the 3” heels that I had trouble walking in yesterday, but today it was no big deal, at least, not after those pony boots.

As much as my body kept telling me to put on some of the cuffs, I didn’t. I wanted to, but I didn’t. I got some jewelry and put it on, a watch, a couple bracelets, some nice hair ornaments and some sweet perfume. I looked in the mirror to do my makeup, but apparently the Bodyform was going to take care of that detail for me. I had a tasteful “face” on already, which matched the blue of my outfit.

I took off the nose chain with great reluctance. I put it in my purse with everything else, and finally I compromised and put my thigh cuffs in my purse as well. I could always put them on later.

Once again, the clothing locked itself to my body as I left the door of my apartment at 6:45 AM to go to the bus stop. I was dreading/anticipating the scene when I got to work.

By 3:00 PM I was ready to go home. An hour and a half more and I would be able to leave, but not before. I was frustrated and tired and my emotions were still on the roller coaster.

My boss had been informed about what had happened to me. It didn’t matter much since I was only a technical writer, someone who had no contact with customers, but it was still humiliating to have him call me Paul over and over, even though I had all the legal documentation to show that I was now Paula. I wouldn’t let that slime call me Mindy.

Others were not so considerate; they called me Mindy at every chance and harassed me some about the sex change. My ears burned and I was ready to cry at any point. Only a couple female coworkers were kind enough to me to allow me to relax. They smiled knowingly at me when they saw my collar and heard the bell, one of them going so far as to discretely knock on her own ChastiLock 2000.

Many other women weren’t that kind. I was sized up as potential competition from the moment I walked into the office. My choice of clothing wasn’t thrilling to them either. One muttered under her breath as I walked by, and I distinctly heard “tramp” as I was leaving.

Apparently I was now a rival in the eyes of the women, and the men all saw me either as a traitor for becoming a female or a conquest to be made. It didn’t matter that this was what made ME happy, oh, no. It was they who had to be comfortable with it and I who was wrong.

To add complication to everything, I smelled like sex. I was kept at such a pitch of arousal that I knew I was leaking pheromones that said “come fuck me” in nice large letters. I hadn’t asked for that in the setup for my fantasy that I had so carefully crafted, but since I was being kept aroused nearly 24/7 I could understand why I smelled like sex.

I had asked to be a sex object and to be teased and kept horny all the time, and it looked like I would be exactly that.

The clock finally read 4:30 PM and I put everything I had been working on away. I shut down my computer and grabbed my purse to leave. I wasn’t going to stay another minute in this place if I didn’t have to.

I stopped at the little girl’s room and put my thigh cuffs on under my skirt. The skirt was tight enough that I hadn’t been able to spread my legs anyhow, but the reassuring touch of steel around my legs and at the base of my crotch made me feel much better. While riding the bus, I put the nose chain back on. I liked the feeling on my cheek.

I had an impulse and I stopped at a Sushi Bar on my way home. I got about five servings of sushi to go and got my backside home. I knew that I was going to have to move it or I would start to get punished.

I was noticing people more as I went through the day. I noticed them looking at me, and even more than that I noticed where they looked on my body. The looks made me feel all soft and gushy, and I always smiled back at them to show that I appreciated the looks.

I got home at 5:23 PM and dropped everything in a pile and sat down to relax. I put my feet up, and unlocked the shoes and clothing so I could get changed into my maid’s uniform. I compromised a bit and spent some time with my feet up, but it was only a little bit.

I thought about my day and what it was like. I had noticed people and they had noticed me, some with negative reactions, but many with positive ones. The strangers were the ones that had the most normal reactions, but still, it was nice being able to be myself for the first time in forever.

I might be trapped, but it was a trap I had constructed and that I loved being in.

I popped a few sushi pieces in my mouth and ate them while I thought. I had always felt out of place, but now I felt more myself than ever before. My penis was gone and in place of that I had a hole that begged to be filled by more than my chastity appliance. I knew that eventually someone would be filling me, taking me, and I was fine with that.

Right now I didn’t know if I wanted a male or female Owner. I decided to think about it while I cleaned.

I stepped into the closet and I hung up the skirt and jacket from today, while putting the blouse into the hamper to be cleaned. I went over to the section of uniforms and started picking through the selections. I didn’t want to be in the French Maid uniforms while I was by myself, so I picked a conservative chambermaid uniform (as conservative as it could be with a skirt ending 3 inches above the knee) and pulled it on.

Naturally as I placed it on my body, the locks closed and I would be unable to take it off until I had finished my chores. I didn’t add any other restraints since it would hamper my ability to do my chores and possibly my ability to go out later tonight.

I dusted and straightened up, I swept and picked up things. I wasn’t going to vacuum until the weekend, but I got up the big messes. I put dinner away in the fridge and thought about my life.

I didn’t think that I was going to be able to stay at the firm for much longer. While I could do my job from home, and do it while I was completely locked and tied up, I didn’t think the program of reeducation was going to help me in writing technical manuals. Fashion and makeup didn’t translate well to describing software components to someone who couldn’t see the code.

I turned on the TV and sure enough the only channels I could watch without being punished were more frivolous channels. I selected a program talking about how to do a perfect manicure and I left it there while I worked. It ran in the background and I thought about who I would want as an owner.

Thinking about what sex of person I wanted was immaterial. I tried to instead imagine qualities I wanted. About the time I got to straightening up the bathroom, I had something of a list.

• They had to be firm
• They had to be confident
• They had to know exactly what they wanted
• They had to be able to clearly tell me what to do
• They had to be able to discipline without being cruel
• They had to be able to deal with me as my intelligence shrank.

I wanted someone who was able to control without violence, to be able to punish without abuse. I had enough of that going on in my life now; it was going to be interesting to find someone who met all my criteria.

I could tell that the people at work were probably not going to be it.

At 7:20 PM I finished up my chores and went to get changed. At first I had thought to simply stay at home, but I decided that I did want to go out for a while.

I looked in my closet for a clubbing-type of outfit, I wanted to go out and show off. I found just what I was looking for, a leather halter top, a micro-mini and some “fuck me” shoes.

I unlocked my corset and put it aside and tried to unlock the thigh restraints. Nothing doing. They were on and would stay there for however long they had until the timer ran out. I sighed deeply and stepped into my shoes, which locked on me as they should.

I put on some large dangly hoop earrings, some bangle bracelets and some hair ornaments. I felt slutty and my makeup reflected that.

I grabbed a purse and put the things I needed into it and ran out the door, to go to find a club to dance in. I needed some rewind time.

I got back home at about 11:30. I was tired and danced out. I managed to get my bootie shook out, but there wasn’t that much action since it was a weeknight. I was mostly there myself, and I didn’t care if I was dancing by my lonesome, it was fun. That was something else that had to go on my list of “Owner Qualities”, a sense of humor and enjoyment.

I got a lot of offers too, but since I couldn’t do anything, I didn’t take anyone up on them.

There was one guy there who had smoky eyes and the most divine hair ever created. When he danced with me, I felt myself melt into him. It was odd because he didn’t take advantage of that either, he didn’t grope or grab my ass. I know I would have been doing that had I still been a guy.

I had several dances with him and I was still floating above the ground.

Just thinking of him and my nipples got hard. Oh, those nanobots were working overtime.

Just to see I picked up the remote and punched the “Unlock Chastity” button. The shock that followed was so exceedingly painful I can’t compare it to anything. I had hoped that I could get it out, but apparently not.

I sighed deeply and went and changed for bed. Nightgown and restraints. But when I lay down on the bed, my mouth opened and wouldn’t close. The slots wouldn’t take the cards on the tethers either. Apparently I had to sleep with my oral chastity in.

So I got up and put it in. Once again my mouth was filled and the thing extended down my throat, almost to the gagging point. I had to spend a few minutes breathing so that I could keep from puking. That would have been very bad.

I chained myself up again, this time with my hands more in the middle of the bed. I inserted the card in the bed frame for my hands, and then the tethers tightened up, keeping me in the middle of the bed. My ankles were both locked to the bottom of the footboard, with my feet together since I still had the thigh cuffs on.

I fell asleep and had dreams about smoky eyes and curly hair. Erotic dreams didn’t even begin to describe them. I swear I felt myself giving him a blowjob, his huge cock ramming down my throat, feeling his pubic hairs on my lips and face, tasting the salt from his sweat and smelling the musk from his body.

I woke a few times squirming with need and desire. I ached and wanted to orgasm right now. Unfortunately the nanobots were not willing to cooperate.

That was my life. I lived that for days then weeks. It was the same story over and over. I didn’t go out every night, and some times I didn’t eat, but I worked during the day, I slept at night, I cleaned in the early evening, and I exercised every morning. The distances got a bit harder or I went faster, the cleaning was just a bit of straightening up and some putting things away. I watched more fashion and movie star tell-alls on TV and surfed on fluff sites.

I did go to many porn sites and those got me even more excited than the sites that had gossip and fashion. I tried ordering a porn movie from Pay Per View and I discovered that those shows also got me horny. VERY horny.

Then came my first weekend. I knew I was going to have to go through the Black Button Program, and I couldn’t put it off any longer. So Saturday night, after I got in, I decided to use the nighttime to have fun.

I chose the Chasti-Jacket and the post. I sat at the computer and programmed the post to move down into the floor until it was just two and a half feet tall. I placed the stool attachment on the top, making sure it was seated firmly. Basically it was a seat like a unicycle used, just a curved piece of leather and foam so that when I was sitting on that area between my vagina and my anus, I had some padding and comfort.

The spreader bar folded out of the side of the post and another one folded out about at the height of the knee. I knew that this meant I was to have all my restraints on.

I did add a tether to the track system in the ceiling. I wanted to lock my oral chastity up to that so I wasn’t thrashing around as much.

I stripped as far as I was able to, and I put on the thigh, knee and ankle cuffs. I walked over to the post and used a small box to get up on the padded seat. Once there, I kicked the box away and I felt the chastity plugs in my vagina and anus lock hard to the seat. I knew I wasn’t going anywhere.

I reached up and grabbed the tether and inserted it into my oral chastity, locking it in place. The tension on the line tightened until I was pulled up slightly, and I started getting horny.

I pushed the black button on the remote and tossed the remote on the couch. It wouldn’t start until I was totally secured. I squirmed some and managed to get the Chasti-Jacket on and once I put my arms in their correct places, I felt everything start locking and pulling tight. I then carefully positioned my legs where they should be, so that the spreader bar was attached to my ankles, and the knee restraints were on that bar, and the thigh restraints were attached to the side of the seat I was on.

I felt everything lock down and get just a smidge tighter on my body, and I knew I was in for it now.

The program started slowly, rubbing my back as if it were a massage. I felt the occasional pop on my ass and I closed my eyes to feel, and then realized I couldn’t get them back open. That’s okay I thought, I don’t need to see anyhow.

I felt hands caressing me all up and down my back, on my sides and on my front. My breasts were exposed and the hands played with them as well. Then I heard the rattle of chain and I started to panic wondering if someone was in the apartment with me. I

I felt a pinch and then PAIN and pressure on one nipple, followed by the other. I felt weights on my nipples and I could feel a chain on my belly between the nipples. Somehow I was now wearing nipple clamps.

I stopped panicking when I realized that the area of my body that was touched by the cold chain was covered by the Chasti-Jacket. Apparently this was part of the program.

And it continued. I was stroked and touched, tickled and fondled. I was not allowed to speak or moan just little very quiet whimpers in the back of my throat. Anything more and I was punished quickly and severely.

I felt floggers on my back, heavy thuddy floggers, beating me and sending a shock through me. When the shock hit, the chain moved which tugged the clamps which hurt and felt so damned good at the same time.

I passed the first few hours that way, thrashing on the post, beaten by unseen hands and a flogger, eventually spanked with a paddle and finally worked over with whips. All of it stimulated, all of it hurt and then made me feel wonderful. All of it took me to a different mindset.

I would hear things, but that was probably the Bodyform vibrating my eardrums to make the sounds. I knew that the crowd of people who seemed to be t here weren’t really there. But I felt their hands on me, touching my breasts, rubbing my legs, tickling my feet, stroking my neck. Yes, even rubbing my clitoris.

I did orgasm. It was during one point of the scene where fingernails were being raked down my back, scratching but not drawing blood. This happened and I started cumming. The franticness of my moans and the activity of the nails grew and grew the more I tried to stay quiet. Finally I was at last orgasming. I exploded all over the seat I was on, pulling at the leg bonds, fighting to get the Jacket off. But to no avail, I was stuck.

The stroking and little fire sparks on my clit didn’t stop, they continued. I was reduced to animal grunting in the diaphragm rather than the throat, and I was pulling at the tether in my mouth.

I came three times at that point. And I wasn’t sure if I didn’t pass out. But when I came back to myself, I was still on the post, and now a flogger was working over my back and legs, and the pleasure was building again.

I won’t go over every hour of that ten hours, but I know I came at least eight more times that night. Eventually the nipple clamps felt good, and when someone pulled the chain tight, making them pinch my nipples more, I LOVED it. The inside of my thighs and legs started being worked on by the heavy thuddy flogger, and they would “accidentally” strike my lips occasionally. I was well on my way to another orgasm when it all shut off. The pain vanished from my nipples, my back, my buttocks, my legs. It all totally stopped.

I thought that it was switching to another program, but no, the leg restraints started coming undone from the crossbar. Very soon I was able to stand on my own feet, still in the Chasti-Jacket and with the tether in my oral plug.

I so desperately wanted to cum again, I was right there, and I wanted to cry.

The T-bar led me around the apartment several times, restoring circulation to my legs and bottom. My bones, spine, knees and ankles all started popping for the first few minutes, and I was terribly sore, but I followed like a placid mare, and when the tether released my oral chastity, I walked over to the wardrobe to take off the Jacket and found that I couldn’t. I was apparently going to be locked in it some more.

I tried to lay down on my bed, but I couldn’t. It was 11 AM Sunday Morning after all that exercise and cool down period. I was exhausted and I needed sleep. There would be no exercise today since the Black Button overrode my morning gallop, but I still needed sleep. I couldn’t secure myself to the bed, so I went over to the standing cage, worked it open with my foot and stepped in.

Once I was fully inside, the door closed behind me, locking of course. The bars started moving closer, becoming like a mummy bag around me, holding me upright in my Chasti-Jacket. Pretty soon the bars were as compressed around my body as far as they could be, and I couldn’t move an inch any direction. My legs were supported and my knees couldn’t buckle, and I wasn’t going to fall over from the waist, and even my head was erect. The bars on the cage had attached itself to the oral chastity and I couldn’t move my head.

I stood like that for a few minutes, and my eyes snapped closed, and I couldn’t open them again. Apparently the computer program was going to make sure I slept.

I didn’t remember anything until the next morning at 4 AM.

Series Navigation

Mindy the Slave part 1Mindy the Slave part 3

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Mini-Biography:  Joy is a transvestite who has been using her stories as a form of therapy. At this point she has no desire to undergo the full transition, but that might change some day. Read more about her story at My Story on this site.

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